Sometimes you may feel like people don’t like you and that you don’t seem to change, no matter what you try. It can lead to feelings of isolation and confusion, and you may not identify the problem. However, identifying the behaviors that make you feel this way is essential if you want to make a change.
It is important to note that you can never please everyone. However, you can work to please those you care about. This will help you begin to form positive and meaningful relationships with important people.
If you’re one of the lucky ones who doesn’t feel like people don’t like you, then maybe these words will make you think of someone else in your life. It can help you better understand that person and help you identify what people don’t like about that person.
Either way, if it’s you that feels like people don’t like you or you know someone who feels this way, this article should help you understand better. Often times, it is due to pushing people away and doing things to build a wall, even inadvertently.
Why do you feel that people don’t like you
Can blame others
When something bad happens, you may tend to look for someone to blame, even when no one caused the situation. Think if you ever looked for someone to blame when no one was really at fault. Doing this will turn people away from you because blame causes negativity.
Blaming is a negative trait, and most people like to avoid negativity whenever possible. Also, if you are always blaming someone else, it will seem that you will not acknowledge your mistakes. This is another characteristic that positive people like to avoid.
When you blame yourself, you are also wasting precious time that could be devoted to solving the problem. People want to be close to those who will help solve the problem, and if instead you blame yourself, the problem is being solved.
You may not show that you care
Before people can like or show you that they like you, you must show that you care about them. If you are always looking at what you can get out of a relationship rather than what you can bring, they will notice. Any relationship requires you to give at least a little, so be sure to do your part.
When people establish relationships, they need to know that the other person cares about them. Without a feeling of caring, there will be no trust or comfort between the two of you. This will make people avoid trusting you or spending time with you.
Lacks the ability to show empathy
If you hear about someone’s struggles and instantly think that it’s not your problem, then a lack of empathy could be a problem for you. Similarly, if you don’t want to hear about someone else’s problems, you may have a hard time show empathy.
When you are around someone, you should just expect to hear about their problems and obstacles. Also, you should want to know so that you can help or offer comfort.
When you know that someone is hurt or upset, you should allow yourself to feel some of their suffering. If you avoid doing this and try to do it so you don’t have to listen to their problems, you could make some people dislike you.
It’s important to note that these people may like you, but they will treat you differently, which will make you think they don’t like you. They won’t have such a deep connection with you because you don’t know or understand what they’re going through.
People want to surround themselves with people who really care about them. This is one of the most important ways to identify whether or not you care. If you can’t show empathy, you probably feel like people don’t like you.
Often times this characteristic (or lack of) comes from the way you respond to your feelings. If you feel like you can tolerate your feelings and try to push them away, you will likely do that to others.
So when other people express or show their feelings, you too will make them want to push them away. You may get visibly angry or upset with them, which will make them feel ashamed of their emotions. Again, people don’t like this feeling, so they will turn away from you and stop trusting you.
You are arrogant
Pay attention to the way you interact with others. If you don’t allow people to respond to what you’ve said or done, you may be behaving arrogantly. Similarly, if you ignore all the suggestions of others, so you can seem arrogant, as well.
When you dismiss everything other people say and only consider their thoughts, you are probably arrogant. You live with the feeling of always being right, which makes you dismiss what others have to say.
One of the biggest signs of arrogance is never admitting when you’re wrong. Also, another sign is that you will never consider whether other people might have a good idea for you. When you behave in this way, it will appear that other people do not like you.
What You Can Do To Make A Positive Change
You have to admit that some of these feelings have to come from within. Admitting that there is something about you that others may not like will really help you with this.
Show people that you care
When your friends or loved ones are having a hard time, pay attention and show them that you care. Find out or ask what you can do to help them, even if you offer an attentive ear.
Ask questions about your friends’ lives and keep track of events that you know have taken place recently. Avoid talking about yourself unless your friend asks you too. This will let them know that you really care about them and value their presence in your life.
Extend empathy to those around you
If you find that you don’t show empathy often or feel that emotions are uncomfortable, change that. Make an effort to get in touch with your emotions. Then you can show understanding and comfort when someone experiences pain, sadness, shame, or fear.
Show those around you that you care about them by being empathetic when they admit their feelings. Be understanding and put yourself in their position for a minute. This will help you show empathy because you will be able to feel better what they feel.
This sounds more difficult than it really is, but with practice, it will become natural for you. First, work on how you respond to other people when they are upset or face obstacles.
Instead of getting angry, upset, or judging, take a moment before responding. Then, react in a way that is based on how you would feel if you were them. Taking a moment before responding can help you feel negative emotions and feelings and instead show empathy.
While this may make you feel more vulnerable than you would like, it will also help you attract people. They will see that you are kind and caring, and they will want to connect with you. Stop viewing emotions as weakness and instead see them as an opportunity to connect with others.
The first step to showing humility is admitting that you are not always right. Recognize that other people may be right or may have a better idea than you. Consider the opinions of others before automatically following your idea and do so with an open mind.
To do this, you have to start really listening to people. Listen to others, even if you disagree with them, and keep any sarcastic comments to yourself. As you listen, make comments that let other people know that you hear and understand them.
If you ever feel like people don’t like you, you should consider why this may be the case. It is probably due to their normal behaviors and attitudes. However, with positive changes in your life, you can stop feeling like people don’t like you.
This is not to say that everyone will like you, because that is simply impossible to achieve. Instead, it only helps those you care about to be attracted to you. When this happens, you will experience more happiness and you will not feel lonely or isolated.
While you should always stay true to yourself, these changes can help make a difference in your life. You can remain the person you are as you work to become a better person. Remember these reasons why people might not like you, and then do what you can to change those things.