If you’ve ever been involved in or related to a manipulative person, do you often wonder what makes a narcissist change? Many believe that these people are trapped in a pattern of unpleasant qualities that they can never alter. Some experts think that once this person gets on their devious ways, there is no way to change them.
the narcissistic is difficult to deal with on a good day. They like to dominate conversations and make extravagant demands to get attention. They lie and manipulate to get ahead in life, and they are not above throwing you under the bus to keep their wrongdoings a secret.
If you are in a relationship or have this person in your family, will all your interaction with them be turbulent? While these people are often painted in low light, they can also have redemptive qualities. Also, what causes a narcissist to change their way of being may be time and their decisions in life.
Does growth change your personality?
A study brings some hope to those who must deal with these devious people regularly. The University of Mannheim did a study that analyzed in depth the characteristics of the manipulator. This analysis is that many of today’s youth have narcissistic symptoms and wanted to track the changes.
Researchers want to see if these people can turn off and focus on the needs of others. Although previous studies have shown that narcissism is more prevalent in today’s society, no one has followed these patterns of behavior from childhood to adulthood.
The researchers followed the diagnosed people from ages 18 to 41. With the data collected, they were able to see if people become less narcissistic over time or more manipulative. The unique thing about personalities is that they can change as a person learns and grows.
A teenager who reaches the threshold of adulthood at 18 will not be and will not act the same way when he is 35 years old. Life circumstances and things like work, family, and friends can play a role in personality changes. Are you the same person you were when you reached the magical age of 18?
Of course, you are not the same. Nobody acts or thinks like they did when they just finished high school. Although it is a milestone to graduate and enter the “real world”, there are still many lessons to learn. Each choice you make will help define your character and shape your personality.
Take, for example, a person hired to make sales. They need to open up and speak to the public to be successful. They learn to work with the crowd to win customers. This type of work, without a doubt, can turn a shy person into a more outgoing one by motivating them with money.
A study of temperament disturbances
Using this basis, the researchers wanted to see if these people’s life choices helped or hindered their personality development. The research used 519 people, a mix of men and women, to measure their narcissism. The raters took a deep look at the life events that had occurred in each person’s life. The things measured were:
• Marriages and serious relationships
• New jobs or career paths
• Serious injuries
• Loss of friends or loved ones
The participants had to classify these events according to how they correlated with their life. They were asked to mark whether it had a positive or negative effect on them. Could these events be what makes a narcissist change?
Time for self-assessment
Using the basis of this study, evaluate your life. What events would you say define you as a person? Are you married and have children or have you chosen the single life? Do you have a good job or have you struggled to get it financially?
Do you have a supportive family unit or are your friends more related to you? All of these things can have a significant impact on how a person acts and reacts to stressors. Someone who has a good support system may experience financial losses or problems, but they know they have someone behind them.
It makes all the difference in what happens next. Narcissism is a Personality disorder It often develops out of a deep-seated need for acceptance. This study was about to test whether peripheral factors could help someone change these evil and manipulative ways.
A comprehensive look at peripheral factors
There were many factors in the exam that provided the researchers with the data they needed. Everyone has things in their life that they cannot control. The study analyzed the prestige of each person’s life.
• Work and professional career
The researchers wanted to know if they had a degree, finished high school, and what kind of job they had. Were they respected in their employment and did they have supervisory responsibilities? Did they bring home a good salary? Then each participant rated their satisfaction in this area of life.
When a person is not satisfied with their work, it can make them miserable. Think about your current position; Are you satisfied with your salary, title and achieved success? It can certainly be a significant factor in your personality if you have to go to a job every day that you hate.
If a person feels underrated, underpaid, and like they’re not living up to their potential, it’s easy to see how it can affect their temperament.
When considering what makes a narcissist change, relationships were another aspect they evaluated. The evaluators asked the participants about their marital status. Were they married and had children or were they single parents?
It is easy to see how this could significantly affect an individual’s personality. Think about your life. If you were in an abusive marriage, it would affect you negatively. However, if you had a partner who adored you and was your best friend, then your answer would be more favorable.
Researchers need to see if these people were in what they called “an ideal union” or if they were unlucky in love. Single parents who struggle every day are not going to answer to the same person who has a spouse handling 50 percent of the load.
The final part of the evaluation process to see what makes a narcissist change was about health. If you don’t think health can significantly affect your temperament, ask someone who has had cancer, lupus, or another debilitating condition. When you’re sick and tired all the time, you don’t feel like going out and socializing or keeping your social life lively.
Another part of the data needed was to see if people were overweight. Did you know that there are direct links between depression and obesity? Poor body image can be a motivating factor behind the narcissist, as they feel they need to compensate for their perceived negative image.
People who have frequent visits to the hospital and doctor, and those who take many medications, have important clues about life changes that affect personality.
After taking a comprehensive look at all of these participant details, the researchers were able to render an informed opinion. There was a measurable decrease in narcissism scores as a person ages. The study shows that this manipulative personality reaches its peak in early adulthood, but it seems like a lesson as many enter the real world.
People higher on the narcissism scale held supervisory positions where they had the power to manipulate. People with children did not have the vanity problems that people without children did. In fact, parenting seems to encourage humility.
The good news of this study is that there is hope if it is a manipulative person. It seems that what makes a narcissist change is a good dose of life and a quick kick from the real world. Life has a way of bringing an individual back to reality and giving him new insights with each event.
While this may not explain a person who is 40 or 50 and continues to act devious, it certainly gives the younger generation hope. Another interesting theory is that children tend to be a bit more “self-centered” because they lack the life experiences necessary to humiliate them.
An 18-year-old fresh out of high school thinks he knows everything and is ready to take over the world. However, once they learn how scary responsibility can be and pay for pills while juggling 100 other things, it has a way of putting you at ease. With every storm in life come lessons that you learn.
Life events won’t change a true personality disorder, but it helps. There is still a need for therapy and treatment when someone is so manipulative that they destroy the relationships around them. Fortunately, what makes a narcissistic change is growing up. So there is always hope.