Do you often feel like you are struggling? Are you worried that you will never live a full life? Are you stuck in your mind or in your circumstances and you don’t see a way out?
Do not worry. It’s normal to feel a little lost sometimes, and it’s not the end of the world! Here are 5 ways to stop struggling and suffering and 4 ways to live a full life.
5 ways to stop fighting and suffering in life
Often times, people try to downplay their emotions or talk to themselves by insisting that they are not struggling. For one thing, this may stem from a genuine desire to promote positive thinking. On the other hand, you don’t get rid of those feelings, you just repress them.
Studies indicate that those who suppress their emotions and try to suppress their struggles suffer it, while those who express their problems feel more positive later. Recognizing that the problem exists allows your brain to deal with it, allows you to express those complex feelings, and validates what you experience.
Here are some ways to acknowledge that you are having difficulty:
- Just say out loud that you are struggling or what your problem is; “I’m struggling” or “I’m upset because I lost that promotion” are some examples.
- Write everything you feel and all the struggles you face in a private journal; do not filter and write absolutely everything that comes to mind, no matter how silly it sounds.
- Talk to someone you trust and care about your struggles, or find a counselor who can listen.
2. Take responsibility for creating a fulfilling life
It’s easy to blame all kinds of things for the problems you face. It is difficult to take responsibility, especially for things like your own suffering or struggle. You can blame:
- Your family
- Childhood factors
- Your situation
- Environmental influences
- Your friends
- The ones who have hurt you
- Your disorders
- Your disabilities
While it’s fair and even necessary to acknowledge how all of these factors have influenced the person you are today, that doesn’t mean you should keep blaming them forever. At some point, your life falls completely into your hands.
You are the person in the sails of your life. You have the ability to heal, to make the best of what you have, and to choose the way you respond externally to different events and to the people around you.
This is not to say that all your problems, including those initially caused by things beyond your control, will go away as soon as you take responsibility. But it does mean that it is time for you to put your positive thinking into action and accept that you are the only one with the ability to sculpt your future and your attitude towards your struggles!
3. Remember the goodness in you
There are many things in your life that perhaps you wish you had done better. You may wonder if you really are a good person or if the people around you like you. When this happens, you can strengthen yourself by remembering the goodness that naturally resides in your soul.
Shambhala Buddhist beliefs involve the concept of “basic goodness,” which refers to the tradition of believing in the basic goodness inherent within everyone and the universe, no matter how negative or chaotic the world or life may seem. No matter what your religion is, it is important not to lose sight of the knowledge that good exists in the world.
Despite everything you’ve been through, there are things in you that are good and there are things in the world that are good. With the internet, you can easily find charities, on-camera acts of kindness, and even just plain lovable and loving animals that can remind you of the positive things the world has to offer. Maintaining positive thinking by maintaining this belief can help reduce feelings of suffering or struggle.
4. Get used to change
Change is a common part of life, but it is part of the reason many people feel like they are struggling. Some people regret the change and hate the fact that their life has been altered. But listen carefully – your life is in a constant state of flux! No matter what you are doing, you are changing because change is constant and unstoppable.
Feeling uncomfortable with change can hurt you in the long run, as it often means that you are uncomfortable with life. It can also make you:
- Spend too much time thinking about the past instead of focusing your energy on moving on.
- Immerse yourself in regrets and missed opportunities instead of learning from mistakes
- Holding on to things for too long instead of realizing that it may be time to let go and move on.
Change is inevitable and happens every second of the day. This means that bad times will turn to good and good to bad, and that’s the way it is. Learn to embrace and encourage change rather than resist it, and you will be much better riding the waves of life.
5. Do things differently for a fuller life
As you get used to accepting change, you will also discover that there is so much power within you. If something is causing you problems, you can simply decide to do things differently. You can change things in your life! Here are some examples of things you can do differently to stop your struggles:
When a negative emotion arises, it is always good to acknowledge it. But then instead of cooking in it, you can evaluate it. Is this emotion reasonable? Does the situation justify it? How else can you react to the situation in a more positive way? Changing how you feel about things takes practice, but you will soon discover that you naturally have more positive thinking about the world.
Life is full of routines and some of them may unknowingly contribute to your suffering. Are you furious with the daily traffic? Take a different route or leave at a different time. Tired of feeling like you have nothing to do at night? Take up a new hobby or add an evening activity to your routine. Are you tired of waking up exhausted? Set an earlier bedtime. There are so many possibilities!
Your perspective is one of many. If your perspective focuses on your suffering and the negative aspects of your life, you can choose to find new ways of seeing the world. Appreciate the things around you and find silver lights even in the darkest clouds. Ask or listen to other people who have different perspectives on life. It is incredibly enriching to realize how much a paradigm shift can change your life!
4 ways to live a full life
Being kind to others allows you to divert your focus from yourself to others. While you should prioritize yourself, when you have time to spare, using it to dedicate yourself to helping others is a wonderful way to feel fulfilled.
Research has found that positive Social behavior can decrease feelings of stress while improving mood, strengthening relationships, and even leading to better physical health. Here are some ways to do acts of kindness:
- Be a shoulder for someone to cry
- Volunteer or donate to a cause you believe in
- Do someone else a favor.
- Give a gift to someone you care about
- Give a partner a massage
2. Get out of your comfort zone
Staying in a bubble where you only feel safe and secure sounds nice, but it can stifle you and prevent you from reaching your full potential or fulfillment. It’s always good to have order in your life, but you could also use a challenge!
Research has found that people who leave their comfort zone enjoy more positive progress on your personal learning journeys. It gives it to you:
- New experiences
- Difficult lessons
- Additional Information
- More choices in life
- Possibilities of finding passions
So every day, do something that puts you a little outside of your comfort zone. Learn to challenge yourself and be comfortable with discomfort. You will always learn more and be happier doing more than doing less, and no one will be satisfied with being bored.
3. Prioritize your health
A healthy body creates a healthy mind. It sounds “unconvincing” to have to be physically healthy to be mentally healthy, but health allows you to live longer and enjoy more things without suffering them. Here are some ways you should prioritize your health:
It would be helpful if you exercised regularly. 150 minutes of elevated heart rate per week is all you need, so start scheduling some physical activity. You don’t need to hit a gym either – dance with all your heart, play sports, do a little gardening, or even go for a brisk walk!
· Eat well
You don’t need to have a perfect diet, but eating balanced meals and making food choices will help you feel better. Limit your unhealthy treats, so they really feel like rare rewards, don’t skip meals, and eat good, reasonable portions.
Get enough sleep
Lack of sleep makes you feel really bad, and it’s hard to feel satisfied when you’re feeling bad! Make sure you get at least 7 hours of sleep each night, and if you’re still tired after that, see a doctor for ways to help.
4. Go for your dreams
You only have one life, and if there is something that you are passionate about or something that you are dreaming about, you should do it! While your passions and accomplishments may not solve all your problems, they can certainly contribute to feelings of success and satisfaction.
Of course, achieving goals is easier said than done, and it’s easy to do it the wrong way. Here are some tips to help you achieve your dreams:
- Create measurable, reasonable, and short-term and long-term goals.
- Surround yourself with people who support you and your dreams
- Join communities of people who have similar dreams
- Learn to Take Reasonable and Calculated Risks with Healthy Backup Plans
- Don’t let anyone ridicule your dreams.
- Remember that progress is not linear, and it’s okay to have good and bad days as long as you keep learning and keep moving forward.
- Take a break from time to time and don’t overwork your efforts to the point of exhaustion.
- Keep your expectations challenging but reasonable.
There are many ways to overcome your struggles and create a fulfilling life. Your unique life journey can take you there if you put the effort into it. The power is always within you!