We all deal with negative thoughts and feelings. Sadly, these painful emotions always seem to come up at the most inopportune times. The real problem is that these unresolved emotional struggles can distract you from the good things in your life.
If you give these thoughts a lot of credulity, you will soon notice that your way of thinking is more negative than positive. Breaking the habit of a pessimistic mindset isn’t easy and requires retraining your brain to let things go. When was the last time you felt stressed?
The average person experiences stress quite often and it can reach explosive levels before you know it. Consequently, when you are under pressure, your mind tends to brood over all the problems from your past that keep resurfacing. How calm the chaos in your mind and get the internal chatter to stop?
Four ways to deal with painful emotions
It doesn’t matter if someone has hurt or abused you; Any injury can make you reflect on all the ills in your life. Fortunately, there are four ways that you can use to overcome these problems and move on.
1. Learn to be present in the moment
One of the most powerful tools you will learn is how be in the moment. It’s easy for your mind to wander into the past when things get crazy. Your mind needs justification for what you feel, which is why it likes to have a pity party and bring out all your painful emotions from the past.
Another commonly occurring problem is that people worry about things that haven’t happened yet. How many times do you sit and worry about something that may or may not happen in the future? If you have an anxiety disorder, you are more likely to worry than someone else.
However, a Article referenced a study on concern. Experts found that more than 85 percent of the things you worry about will never happen. Think of all that time you lose because you are not present in the moment.
Both your future and your past are robbing you of valuable time in the present. The way to counteract this problem is to focus on the here and now and not give prominence to yesterday or tomorrow. Now this doesn’t mean that you shouldn’t plan, but it does mean that you don’t allow what hasn’t happened yet to haunt your mind.
It seems like a simple process, but it is not as easy as it sounds. However, there are a few tricks that can help you live in the moment. Find an image that brings you peace. Perhaps your place of refuge is a beach surrounded by seagulls and waves crashing on all sides.
When you hold this image, let your mind loosen. If this trick doesn’t work, you can try counting. When the anxiety of painful emotions begins to accelerate, you need to turn it off. Start by counting from 100 to one. You can even calculate five by five if that makes things more interesting.
The key is to focus on counting; So your mind doesn’t have time to ruminate on all those painful things. This strategy helps you clear your mind so you can reconnect with the world around you.
2. Refocus your mind and find peace of mind
If you allow your thoughts to take center stage, you will disconnect from the world around you. How can you focus on your job or your child taking small steps if your mind is a million miles away? Worse yet, if you feel guilty or ashamed associated with these emotions, it can put you in a horrible mood.
The more power you give to these harmful and painful emotions, the stronger they will become. It would be helpful if you turned off these feelings by reconnecting with the world around you. One way you can reconnect is by volunteering. It’s a challenge to have a pity-for-yourself party when you see that someone else has things much worse than you.
Another thing you may want to do is put your feet on the ground to ground yourself and pay attention to your surroundings. Focus on the here and now and observe the color of the room, the smell that hangs in the air, and the conversations taking place around you. Dialect behavioral therapy teaches you to get out of anxiety by focusing on the atmosphere.
Since your brain cannot focus on two things at once, it is much more enjoyable to focus on your space than it is on these emotional challenges. Finally, to reconnect with your surroundings, you must go out into the sun. Even if it’s raining, who says there’s something wrong with dancing in the rain?
Mother nature has so many therapeutic properties that many do not use. Do you love the smell of spring rain that sends the nectar of sweet flowers through the air? Have you noticed that there are birds building nests as they prepare for a new life?
There is so much beauty and tranquility around you, but if you are caught up in the talk inside your mind by your pain, then it will pass you by.
When you allow these painful emotions to creep in, self-negativity is promoted. Are you a self-conscious person by nature? Do you have a dialogue running through your mind that keeps your esteem low?
Negative and hurtful emotions are often accompanied by harmful thoughts. All these thoughts play like a movie in your mind that keeps going round and round. Unfortunately, these thoughts are very distracting and prevent you from accomplishing what you need to do.
Have you ever tried talking to someone whose mind was a million miles away? It is like pulling your teeth to get a response from them. It becomes impossible to talk to you and it is a challenge for you to focus when you pay attention to this reel of negativity that is running through your mind.
To increase your self-esteem, you need to do activities that make you feel more confident. Can you bake or cook well? Why not make a batch of cookies to take to the office? When people taste the kindness that comes from your hands, their compliments will give you a boost.
It feels good to be congratulated. Now once you have that fresh feeling in your mind, you need to remember how good it feels when you put all negativity aside and allow yourself to shine.
4. Don’t run away from these thoughts: process them
Have you ever met someone who can’t overcome a problem? Take, for example, a woman named Ruth. She was engaged to marry the love of her life, Bob.
Ruth and Bob had a great relationship and he completed it. I really wanted to spend an eternity with him. One day they were swimming at the local quarry and Bob dived into a section that was not as deep as he thought.
He broke his stomach and had other internal injuries. Bob passed away that day and Ruth was never the same again. Although she found love again and got married, not a day went by that she didn’t think of Bob.
The pain in his heart was too much to bear, and even with seven children and a house full of work to do, his mind often replayed the events of that day. Sadly, Ruth never accepted the significant loss she suffered in her life and developed Bipolar disorder.
If you had processed the feelings properly and dealt with your pain, your outcome could have been quite different. The fact is, your negative and hurtful emotions will haunt you if you let them. What Ruth had to do was stop brooding over the events that happened.
She felt remorse that the tragedy left her unable to deal with the situation effectively, so she hid her emotions inside herself and never spoke about it. How much better he would have felt if he let out those emotions and talked about them. Bottling things inside can be dangerous, as your mind can only handle so much stress and pain before shutting down.
You should not run away from your problems and learn effective ways to deal with them. Talk openly, cry out loud, focus on the situation, but the good news is that you will finally come to terms with things. It’s okay to hurt yourself and it’s okay to cry, but you can’t let it go on forever.
Your life is going to have ups and downs. There will be triumphs and there will be tragedies. It is so important to give the successes in your life the same attention that you give to your failures.
When situations shake you to the core, you need to get help dealing with these emotions. If the above tricks don’t help you process things, seek the use of a counselor who is well trained in cognitive behavioral therapy CBT or dialectical behavioral therapy DBT. The important thing is to get these feelings from the inside out to have a happy and positive life.