Have you ever hit a dead end on your journey, or perhaps have you had an epiphany as you progressed through life? Have you ever wanted to stop your current path and start over? If so, keep reading!
Starting over can be scary and challenging, especially if you don’t know where to start. Here’s how experts reveal four practical ways to start over in life.
1. Adopt the right mindset
Did you know that you need more than one mindset to start over that involves new goals and directions? If you are a “flat out” type of thinking, you may want to stop and rethink your methods. You need a lot more guidance if you want positive results, especially if you are looking to achieve specific goals.
Research-based scientific writer and author Peg Streep, also an expert on brain science, goal unlinking, and other psychology topics, states that it takes two ways of thinking to achieve goals.
Two types of mindsets:
- Collecting information in multiple different ways
- The ability to solicit and be open to the perspectives and opinions of others.
- The process of weighing, considering and drawing different strategies and decisions.
- The thought required to determine each option and its feasibility
- The process of networking and learning
- Realism, logic and rationality
On the other hand, the second mindset is called the implementation mindset and is the one used to work towards a fresh start and your goals. This involves:
- Optimism, positive thinking and openness to different situations.
- Advancing through different obstacles, struggles and even against logic
- Focus on action on fear or being held back
- Take note of the things that don’t work and keep them in mind to learn as you go.
Why does it matter that these are two different ways of thinking? It means that you should focus on your way of thinking when you start over. You need to be aware of your state of mind and shift your focus as you move from planning to action. You also need to know when to switch from the action phase to the planning phase; For example, if your current perspective is crumbling, you may need to stop and rethink things.
2. Decide on objectives
A new goalless start is pointless and pointless. You won’t find what you’re looking for if you don’t even know what it is or how you can get it. Of course, the trick is that you have to set your goals well and make sure they motivate you. Business and organizational consultant Dr. Susan Murphy lists the following tips for better goal setting:
If you’ve had trouble achieving goals in the past, it’s time to narrow your scope. Start small and make your goals challenging but manageable. You can always change them to be a little higher later. Remember, goals must be achievable, not nearly impossible, or you will never reach them!
Don’t have a lot of goals with a close deadline or multiple goals that you need to all work on at once. This is especially true for those who are often overwhelmed by goals. Your self-confidence will increase with each goal you achieve, and you will soon be ready for closer goals, but you need the patience to get there first!
Write down goals
Take responsibility and remember all your goals by putting them in writing. You want to see them, so you don’t skew them to fit different terms quickly. It’s also a great way to commit to goals – they’re in writing, so they stay in your brain!
Put your goals where you can see them
Post the list of goals or the steps for your goals in conspicuous areas, such as on your work desk, on your refrigerator, or on your mirror. This way, you will always be reminded to continue. You can also check off any goals you achieve to get even more motivated when you see the checked list every day.
But how do you set good goals? You will want to use the acronym SMART. It sounds corny, but SMART goals have been shown to have positive effects on those who attempt them, and they are guidelines that you should not ignore when setting goals. SMART It represents:
Vague goals are sure to hurt your progress and confuse your brain. Make sure you know exactly what your goals are in detail, without room for misinterpretation.
You need to know if you are making progress on your goals. You want to be able to see and be motivated by every measurable step you take, and you also want to make sure that you can be 100% confident that you’ve achieved those goals.
As mentioned above, your goals should be reasonable and shouldn’t be nearly impossible.
When setting goals, focus on the results you want, not the journey itself or the struggle it will require. You want to think about the desired results, not how difficult it will be.
· Limited in time
Make sure that certain deadlines limit your goals. This will spur you to action and remind you to complete those goals on time, preventing you from sitting on them forever.
Rumination refers to the act of being trapped in one or more similar thoughts, usually of a harmful variety, for an extended period. It’s basically like crying over spilled milk but doing it over and over again. When you try to start over, this can cause you to get stuck in the past, thinking about nothing but failure and the reasons for your desire for the aforementioned renewed start.
Renowned social psychologist Daniel Wegner covered a lot of information about rumination, including what was extremely difficult for people to combat. He refers to these thoughts as “white bears,” the kind of chains that repeat themselves and are too difficult to suppress, even with some positive thinking.
Wegner discovered that the brain automatically searches for certain thoughts that we try to suppress. By trying not to think about them, we actually make them worse. Here are some tips to handle rumination and steer clear of your personal white bears while trying to start over:
Designate a time of concern
Set aside a few minutes every day to ruminate all you want. The trick? That is the only time he is allowed to ruminate. Basically, you want to make sure that whenever negative spirals come up during the day, you can say, “Hey, this is not my time to worry! I have to wait before I can pay attention to you! “and temporarily push the thought away. That way, you won’t permanently suppress your emotions, just wait until you can express them all at once!
Break the cycle
When you feel yourself starting to ruminate, break the cycle by turning your attention to something else. Basically distract yourself with something more positive! Do some chores, join in a hobby you enjoy, listen to music, play with a pet, chat with a friend … whatever you need to do to distract yourself from your worrying thought cycles.
Take note of triggers
What is causing your rumination? Try to figure it out. If necessary, keep a small notebook or even a complete journal where you write down the details of your rumination. Who were you with? What were you doing? What could distract you? When you know what your triggers are, you can prepare for those bad thoughts when those triggers occur mentally.
Turn regret into productivity
Regret doesn’t have to be a bad thing. Instead of insisting on it, try to use it productively. Studies indicate that regret can be positive If used to understand your past, learn how to make a better future and prevent those mistakes from continuing or repeating themselves – all crucial elements for a fresh start!
4. Change the way you think about starting from scratch
Many people have negative thoughts about the act of starting over. It can seem like a waste of time or effort, and it can even be something you do that fills you with regret. Don’t let this be the case!
The way you think about new beginnings determines your success. Starting off by looking down at the very idea of what they are is a surefire way to make your journey more difficult. Licensed Psychotherapist, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist, Keynote Speaker, and Author Barton Goldsmith, Ph.D., list the following thoughts about new beginnings that you need to change.
Endings aren’t always bad
The chapters of life end all the time in various ways, some more negative than others. But deciding to close a chapter doesn’t necessarily mean it had a “bad ending.” Instead, think of it as a phoenix dying and burning to ashes, only to rise once more afterward. It’s a much more empowering and healthy way to allow yourself to be satisfied with starting over.
It is not crash recovery
For many, the act of starting over has become synonymous with recovering after failing. This is not the case. When you start over, you are arriving fresh with new knowledge, experience, and renewed vigor and passion. Thinking of starting over as merely a way to recover from failure is an understatement of the incredible things you can do.
Starting over should be celebrated
It’s scary trying to start over, but it’s something to be proud of. Being held back by fear in a new beginning is counterproductive! It is an exciting opportunity with so many branching paths full of potential!
Progress is not linear
Steps back do not mean that you are starting from the beginning. As you move forward in life, think of it as climbing stairs instead of walking a straight path. You’ll go up a few steps, then go back a couple, and yet you’ll always be higher than where you started when you were on the ground. There is nothing wrong with starting over, even if it means losing a bit of progress!
If you’re yearning for a fresh start, the only thing holding you back is you! Be brave and make that decision with these effective methods to start over in a productive way. Sometimes all you really need is a fresh start!