Are you happy? If you can’t say you’re pleased, do you know what’s causing your discontent? Life is full of ups and downs, but you must learn to maintain happiness no matter what comes your way.
Your partner leaves you, your loved ones pass away, and your children give you so much to worry about that it interrupts your sleep. How do you get back on track and get your life back after a significant blow to your happiness? Did you know that you can get into a negative pattern that can make you depressed?
Twelve habits that prevent you from finding happiness
Today is the day that will change everything in your life. You are going to learn the twelve things that are sabotaging you so that you do not find happiness. Are self-destructive habits They are holding you back, and once you identify them, you can learn to alter these behaviors.
Here are the twelve things that keep you from living each day with joy.
1. Be a nice person
Do you try to please others more than yourself? Do you do everything you can to keep those around you happy? You worry so much about people judging or rejecting you that you go out of your way to seek their approval.
Stop measuring your self-esteem and confidence by what others think of you. Remember, you are not responsible for how others feel and they are not responsible for your feelings. Stop taking things so personally and set limits and guidelines for your life.
Finding happiness will be a challenge when you let others dictate your every move.
2. Using numbing mechanisms to cope
Finding happiness is easier for some than for others. However, no one wants to feel sadness, fear, shame, and disappointment. Many people become a master at numbing their emotions and are resistant to happiness. It is easier to overlook what hurts than to be aware of it and work on this problem.
Some say that emotional pain is worse than physical discomfort. However, anything that hurts will get your attention. It would be helpful if you had limits in your life and learned to speak for yourself.
If you’re using food, alcohol, shopping, work, or scrolling on social media to numb your emotions, it’s time to face what hurts so you can get over it.
3. Perfectionism damages your happiness
Do you feel that you must be perfect to succeed and achieve your goals? Unfortunately, the roots of perfectionism are rooted in the belief that you are “less than” more than a successful person. People who struggle with this mindset live in fear of making a mistake.
Did you know that you can have a legacy of perfectionism What is passed down through genetics? Your parents or siblings may suffer from the same problem. You must put aside these unrealistic expectations and learn to deal with criticism.
Start by setting realistic expectations for your life and not getting overwhelmed when things aren’t perfect.
4. Trying to control everything
You try to control everything, but are failing miserably? You cannot control the world or even those around you. Nobody likes to be surrounded by control freaks who have no limits.
The real problem behind this behavior is that you fear uncertainty. Start by keeping your opinions to yourself and stop giving people unsolicited advice. Then, work on the reasons why you feel like your life is so out of control.
Lack of self-confidence has deep roots that must be discovered, dug up, and properly disposed of.
5. Isolate yourself
It is natural to want to make the world disappear by hiding behind four walls. Sure, your home provides you with comfort as it is your safe place, but you must be careful not to isolate yourself. When you withdraw from the world, it’s easy to lose interest in things like personal hygiene, proper nutrition, and keeping your home clean and tidy.
According to Marian Mitchell, a holistic nutrition health advisor with Way to live whole, you need support, love, friendship and laughter, which comes from being around other people. Additionally, self-isolation can be an ongoing problem that you must overcome.
6. Hide your emotions behind a tough exterior
Why are people afraid to show emotions? It’s okay to hurt yourself and it’s okay to cry. Crying does not mean that you are weak and hiding your emotions does not make you stronger.
You are resilient by nature, but it’s okay to fall apart when the situation calls for it. Don’t hold back your feelings and hope they go away. Allow yourself a good cry, and you may even get angry and vent from time to time. Suppressing your emotions is simply setting things up for a big bang later.
7. Preparing for disaster
You get involved in catastrophic thinking? You cannot enjoy the good things in life because you are always waiting for the next disaster to come. Rejections and disappointments from past mistakes can hang around and make you miserable. The key to finding happiness is being grateful for what you have and finding joy in the smallest things every day.
8. Comparing yourself to others prevents happiness
When you fall into the trap of comparing yourself to others, you will feel miserable. It is difficult to avoid this habit, especially when you have low self-esteem or do not value your self-esteem. Please don’t feel bad about yourself and compare your life with that of others as you only see their best moments.
To fix this problem, you must familiarize yourself with your successes. It’s okay to be proud of your accomplishments. It is not about bragging that you are proud of what you have done; be sure to stay humble. You don’t need a Pulitzer Prize to be happy with the things you’ve accomplished.
Try to keep a journal of all your accomplishments. Whenever you feel the need to compare yourself to others, remind yourself of all the amazing things you have done.
9. Being overly critical of yourself
Do you punish yourself for minor mistakes? You are human and you are going to make mistakes. However, you can’t wallow in pity every time you do something wrong.
Stop criticizing yourself for the things you can’t control and the times you stumble. Rather, look at these mistakes as lessons and learn something from them.
10. Engaging in self-sabotaging behavior
Self-sabotaging behavior is difficult to understand. These behaviors begin by feeling justified in your feelings and pursuing what you want, whether it is right or wrong. Even when everything is going well in your life, you can punish yourself for past failures.
Suppose you got a promotion at work. Since he has been with the company for ten years, he feels justified in the increase. However, it is not shortly after his ascent that he begins to think about all the failures along the way.
Your fears of not measuring upstart will flood your mind, and you will soon realize that you are in a panic that you are going to screw things up. You are using self-sabotaging behaviors. When you expect things to fall apart at any moment, you are creating the inevitable. You must love yourself enough to avoid such behaviors.
Take steps to stop this behavior by pointing out the behavior and understand that your inner critic is speaking out of anxiety, pain, and fear. Stop using words like:
Changing your vocabulary can help you transform the way you think. Be proud of your achievements and stop being so critical.
11. Base your self-esteem on achievements
Accomplishing too much is very unhealthy when you start to make your accomplishments focus on who you are. Being an achiever is based on the belief that you will avoid rejection by others if you do more. You often see these characteristics in workaholics.
According to Psychology Answers, workaholics are driven by anxiety, low self-esteem, and intimacy issues, which is why they hide behind their work. These people often engage in neuroticism, perfectionism, and industriousness, and that makes them miserable.
12. Taking care of unhealthy guilt
Everyone clings to a bit of guilt. However, you should apologize, express regret, make changes, and move on. When you get stuck with your feelings of guilt, it will act in a way that is unhealthy.
While it is good to be aware of your responsibility, you need to make sure that you do not distort a situation in your mind and exaggerate things.
Final thoughts on how to find happiness
Did you learn anything from this article that can help you change the way you think and move towards the pursuit of happiness? You have a life to live, so why not make it the best you can?
Instead of engaging in perfectionism, comparing yourself to others and self-sabotaging behaviors, it’s time to live your truths. Being honest with yourself is liberating and can open you up to finding the true happiness you long for in life.